Was totally and absolutely in a dilemma.. I had got an offer from IIMB for an Executive MBA Program, and at the same time, a new and hyped up role in a new company (more on that later). And they were both the stuff, my pipe-dreams are made of. But clashed and collided in a multitude of ways and dates, and all of those horrible things that were giving me nightmares.
I was on the verge of walking away (heavy heart and sniffling) from the IIMB program, thinking I wouldn’t be able to deal with it. Maybe the time wasn’t right, maybe I was better off with prioritizing only the job, etc etc.
Then spoke at length to P. and P. last night, and smsed back and forth with K., who all talked me into fighting and thinking it out, and finally saying YES to the IIMB. They think, and thus, now I think, I will be able to juggle both.
A huge, HUGE hug to P. and P. and K. for the motivation..
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
AAAAAAARGH!!!
Frustration to the hilt. The CFO is out of town on work, my financial induction happens on Tuesday, and till then…. zilch (how long CAN one Google, man!!)
Which means, I’m sitting here.. I can’t network (Facebook, LinkedIn, et al), I can’t chat (no Skype, GTalk, MSN, yada yada), I can’t mail (MindTree's Internet Access Policy does not allow access to this site as it has been categorized as "Web-based E-mail"), AND I can’t view most sites (MindTree's Internet Access Policy does not allow access to this site as it has been categorized as "Entertainment").
Of Course I Want Entertainment!!
Anyone would want entertainment if they had to sit hour after hour looking at a wall, with no one around. Innumerable cups of coffee, multiple phone calls, angst about IIM or not alongside new job and all that, notwithstanding. Specially when I ‘m used to, and almost thrive on, frentic activity.
P.S.: Sigh!! I think I’m having hysterics. The next week I hope, brings better things to come..
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Just another day in paradise..
Sitting here, in my new office, on my first day – no laptop assigned to me yet, no access card, no desk – in short, no nothing. Met some of my “team to be”...have a team lunch thing as well, in a while, to meet the rest of them all.
“And in the dangling conversation.. and the superficial smiles”
Paul Simon knew what he was talking about, for sure. Though, in all fairness I must admit that this is expected. In all offices, the first few days, for the new employees are generally stilted, and fraught with tension.
“Will I fit in?” “Will they like me?” “I hope I’m doing the right thing” “I wonder whose head I stepped on, to bag this job – unfortunate, but bound to be true”.. and so forth.
I was experiencing deja-vu actually.. laughing at myself, as I was walking down the different cubes, introducing myself to different people. How often in the last 5 years, in my previous company, have I seen people going around doing the same, and then smiled politely and forgotten him/her in an instant as soon as they passed?
I’m currently placed outside the team facility - remember, no access card? – and its all quiet.. so very quiet. Each time the door opens, I hear snatches of conversation and laughter, till the door closes again, and I’m left with good ole me. It's a lonely feeling.
A wave of nostalgia hits me, a veritable tsunami. Nostalgia for my old office, where I was a “dada”, untouchable, un-putdown-able. Walking around hands in pockets, whistling any tune that came to my mind, me knowing everyone, and everyone knowing me. I know I got away with a lot of stuff that others couldn’t dream of saying or doing.. simply because of the bonds I had forged over time.
I’m remembering the times in the cafeteria, drinking innumerable cups of coffee, the wind in our hair, the papad flying across, end to end. Friends telling me, patiently "Sri, coffee khatam kar" as I would get engrossed in conversation, and the coffee would grow ice cold in the cup. I miss the Dumb Charades with F. and S. guessing phrases no other person could think of.
“I tot I taw a puddy tat a teeping up on me”
Shouting out loudly in laughter with friends.. as R. would put it “gir gir ke haasna” .. all the others would turn to look at us and grin at our craziness. My heart to heart talks with S., the quiet one of our group, who I always look to for confirmation on things that matter. And beating M. with a shoe, when he bugged me too much.. which was really very often.. on the Delhi Calcutta divide.
Maybe that will happen here.. maybe not. Only time will tell. Till then, I’l maintain a casual pose, stick one hand in my pocket and cross my fingers.
“And in the dangling conversation.. and the superficial smiles”
Paul Simon knew what he was talking about, for sure. Though, in all fairness I must admit that this is expected. In all offices, the first few days, for the new employees are generally stilted, and fraught with tension.
“Will I fit in?” “Will they like me?” “I hope I’m doing the right thing” “I wonder whose head I stepped on, to bag this job – unfortunate, but bound to be true”.. and so forth.
I was experiencing deja-vu actually.. laughing at myself, as I was walking down the different cubes, introducing myself to different people. How often in the last 5 years, in my previous company, have I seen people going around doing the same, and then smiled politely and forgotten him/her in an instant as soon as they passed?
I’m currently placed outside the team facility - remember, no access card? – and its all quiet.. so very quiet. Each time the door opens, I hear snatches of conversation and laughter, till the door closes again, and I’m left with good ole me. It's a lonely feeling.
A wave of nostalgia hits me, a veritable tsunami. Nostalgia for my old office, where I was a “dada”, untouchable, un-putdown-able. Walking around hands in pockets, whistling any tune that came to my mind, me knowing everyone, and everyone knowing me. I know I got away with a lot of stuff that others couldn’t dream of saying or doing.. simply because of the bonds I had forged over time.
I’m remembering the times in the cafeteria, drinking innumerable cups of coffee, the wind in our hair, the papad flying across, end to end. Friends telling me, patiently "Sri, coffee khatam kar" as I would get engrossed in conversation, and the coffee would grow ice cold in the cup. I miss the Dumb Charades with F. and S. guessing phrases no other person could think of.
“I tot I taw a puddy tat a teeping up on me”
Shouting out loudly in laughter with friends.. as R. would put it “gir gir ke haasna” .. all the others would turn to look at us and grin at our craziness. My heart to heart talks with S., the quiet one of our group, who I always look to for confirmation on things that matter. And beating M. with a shoe, when he bugged me too much.. which was really very often.. on the Delhi Calcutta divide.
Maybe that will happen here.. maybe not. Only time will tell. Till then, I’l maintain a casual pose, stick one hand in my pocket and cross my fingers.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)